The holiday season is upon us, and with it comes the annual deluge of gift guides, most notably from lifestyle gurus like Gwyneth Paltrow’s Goop and Oprah Winfrey. It wasn’t too long ago when we at Salon were making light of the extravagant items featured in Oprah’s Favorite Things and Goop’s notoriously over-the-top holiday gift guide. That was in 2019, a seemingly distant era before a global pandemic and a cascade of anxieties shifted our collective perception of normalcy. Now, browsing these curated collections of consumer desires feels different, almost ominous.
This shift in perspective was crystallized for me in a casual, almost prophetic, suggestion from a waiter. Advising me to simply order the pasta carbonara, his justification wasn’t about culinary merit. Instead, delivered with a nonchalant air of impending doom, was the pronouncement that the world was ending. There was no despair, no humor, just a matter-of-fact acceptance of imminent vaporization. And strangely, it worked. The pasta was indeed delicious, and in that moment, anxieties melted away with each cheesy, creamy bite.
Since then, the specter of societal collapse seems to linger in the background of everyday life, often whispered by friends and family, invariably within the context of commerce. “You only live once,” the pre-pandemic mantra of guilt-free indulgence, has been replaced by a darker, more urgent justification: “the end is nigh.” This sentiment seems to be the only plausible explanation for why I found myself meticulously examining this year’s celebrity-endorsed gift guides, prepared for the usual onslaught of unattainable luxury. To my surprise, however, many items in the 2023 Goop Gift Guide and Oprah’s selections seemed… dare I say… reasonably priced? Comparatively speaking, of course.
Reader, let’s be clear: my income bracket exists in a completely different stratosphere than Gwyneth Paltrow, Oprah Winfrey, or the individuals who meticulously curate these aspirational wishlists. Goop’s holiday gift guide, in particular, still features items that induce sticker shock, like vibrators priced higher than the value of my two-decade-old car.
Yet, amidst the expected extravagance in the Goop gift guide, something shifted. When I encountered an offering of 11 pounds of Parmigiano Reggiano for $396, described as “sourced from Valserena Soladibruna, the oldest dairy in Parma,” my reaction wasn’t outrage. Instead, a surprising thought surfaced: I could actually see myself indulging in that. After all, my commitment to driving an older, less glamorous vehicle is precisely to afford life’s little pleasures, and increasingly, the cost of basic necessities. Why couldn’t a portion of those groceries occasionally include an absurdly priced, once-in-a-lifetime cheese splurge? And let’s face it, 11 pounds of premium parmesan would certainly elevate a lot of pizzas as society crumbles around us.
The pandemic era saw a surge in luxury spending as lockdowns eased, a sort of celebratory splurge. However, persistent inflation has since pushed even many aspirational luxury items further out of reach for the average consumer. This economic reality might explain why this year’s Goop gift guide, and a significant portion of Oprah’s 2023 Favorite Things, showcase relatively “sensible” preposterous items, largely within the two- or three-figure price range. Suddenly, the Goop gift guide, once a beacon of unattainable extravagance, seems to offer items that, while still luxurious, are almost… relatable?
Even Goop’s signature “Ridiculous but Awesome Gift Guide” category, traditionally a source of amusement for its sheer absurdity, feels slightly toned down. Yes, you can still find the aforementioned $15,000 vibrator, along with a $14,580 backgammon set and a $2,000 traditional Heng gong. For the ski enthusiast with deep pockets, there are $2,250 limited edition skis “honoring the iconoclastic spirit of Jean-Michel Basquiat.” Everything one might need for a lavish getaway to a Park City resort, where you might even spot Goop’s founder herself on the slopes, fresh from her recent ski trial escapades.
Within this collection of curated desires, the aforementioned cheese block finds itself sharing digital shelf space with a 53-piece, $10,000 bar cart. Yet, surprisingly, neither of these items claims the title of “least expensive ridiculous offering” in the Goop gift guide. That honor goes to tickets to Asi Wind’s magic show, starting at a mere $120, according to Goop. One can’t help but wonder, though, what exactly is in it for you at that price point within the context of Goop’s usual offerings?
Perhaps this subtle shift in the Goop holiday gift guide explains why the delight we once derived from the sheer outrageousness of previous iterations feels somewhat diminished in 2023. Past Goop gift guides were notorious for hawking markers of exclusivity that were not just impractical but often bizarre and hilariously ostentatious. This year, much of the Goop gift guide selection feels… basic. Overpriced, certainly, but basic. If civilization is indeed teetering on the brink, shouldn’t we be clinging to something more extravagant than a $48 tea towel from the Goop gift guide?
Okay, yes, there are still the $5,125 Chanel skates. But do they at least offer a reflexology treatment while you glide?
We jest, somewhat. To Goop’s credit, alongside the expected luxury items, this year’s gift guide commendably features worthwhile non-profit organizations, including Women’s Health Access Matters, the Brooklyn Library’s Books Unbanned initiative, and The Ocean Cleanup. Consider pairing a donation to the latter with, perhaps, renting an island in Fiji for $39,500 a night (with a three-night minimum, naturally, to ensure you’re not utterly uncivilized).
Oprah’s Favorite Things list, predating Goop’s empire, demonstrates a keener understanding of the prevailing consumer sentiment. Oprah and her team seem to grasp that many of us are feeling financially strained and emotionally weary amidst global instability. A $999 countertop pizza oven is about as extravagant as the queen of daytime gets this year – a sensible splurge that pairs perfectly with that giant parmesan wedge. Even Oprah’s nod to a $600 drip coffee maker offers a touch of attainable luxury, tempting those of us who may not be wealthy but still crave moments of feeling rich, one sip at a time.
While Oprah’s list lacks the brazen comedic extravagance of past years – nothing quite matches the $45 jar of “air” she famously sold out in 2017 – this year’s selection is noteworthy for its focus on small businesses and companies owned by people of color, women, and veterans. The majority of the 112 items on Oprah’s list are priced under $100 and cater to practical needs rather than ostentatious displays of wealth. Those items that exceed the $100 mark largely reflect our collective post-pandemic desire for stylish comforts, like wide-legged pajama pants chic enough to wear to the grocery store without raising eyebrows about one’s precarious financial state.
In contrast, even the once-rare items found in past Goop holiday collections now have more accessible, mainstream counterparts available at your local department store. Take, for instance, the Regalis black summer truffles offered in the Goop gift guide at a “decent” price of $30. But how truly “Goop-y” is a jarred truffle product that you can likely find at Costco? The Goop gift guide abounds with masks, creams, and scrubs – items readily available in the discount bins of T.J. Maxx or Marshall’s in any affluent suburb. And let’s not even delve into the $220 “self-care towel set” featured in the Goop gift guide.
The shift in the Goop gift guide, however, is understandable. As Reuters reported, luxury brands are facing slumping sales as inflation and economic uncertainty dampen aspirational spending. Haute couture houses are recalibrating, moving away from the streetwear frenzy and refocusing on attracting their core, wealthier clientele. These are the consumers like my perpetually stressed sibling, for whom I might consider sending a $17 bottle of “bowel support” – conveniently listed under Goop’s “gifts for travel enthusiasts.”
Perhaps this subtle shift in the tone of the Goop gift guide and Oprah’s Favorite Things is a positive development. Or perhaps, more ominously, it signifies that Goop’s influence has become so pervasive in American culture that its holiday gift guide is no longer a source of outlandish amusement, but rather, just another garden-variety, overpriced catalog – albeit one featuring a $1,925 dog house designed by Hermès. But does any of it truly matter when the world feels like it’s on the brink?
Because, in case you missed it amidst the holiday shopping frenzy, a sound, perhaps the archangel Gabriel’s horn, pierced through the noise a few days ago, signaling, perhaps, that it’s time.
Or maybe it was just the sound of another luxury brand quietly adjusting to a changing economic landscape.
Either way, perhaps it is time to order that expensive cheese and the $30 jar of truffles. The end may not be nigh, but it certainly feels like it has been for quite some time now.
