My heart swelled with pride as I watched my teenage daughter, Ruby, confidently address our church congregation, St. Mary’s Episcopal Church in Cypress, and embrace her identity as a trans woman. It was June 2021, a time of renewed hope after the isolation of lockdown, and our church mirrored this joy by adorning its cross with a Pride flag for the first time. This powerful symbol of acceptance was the backdrop for Ruby’s renaming liturgy, a deeply meaningful ceremony within our Episcopal tradition.
For Ruby, who had once been a timid child, this day marked a profound blossoming. A renaming liturgy is more than just a name change; it’s a public affirmation of a trans person’s true self. It allows for the official correction of records, aligning their baptism certificate with their lived gender, and it invites the community to pledge unwavering support. During the ceremony, which included heartfelt scripture readings and prayers, Ruby, then 17, shared her journey. She spoke of the newfound self-assurance she had discovered since transitioning and the burdens she had shed. Church had always been a sanctuary for Ruby, but now, her happiness transcended those walls. She was radiant, comfortable and even cracking jokes with an easy confidence that filled me with immense joy.
This profound experience within our supportive church community makes the actions of Republican lawmakers in my state all the more infuriating. It is a painful contradiction to witness fellow Christians distorting our faith to deny my child her fundamental rights. These Texas lawmakers propagate the harmful and untrue narrative that trans people are somehow sinful or broken. But the reality, the truth I see in my daughter and in countless others, is the opposite: trans people are a gift to the world. They embody the boundless creativity of God and exemplify the essential spiritual journey we are all called to undertake. Each of us must contemplate: “Who am I created to be? What is the truest expression of myself?” Transgender individuals illuminate the path to authentic living, showing us how to embrace our destined selves. If only Texas lawmakers would open their hearts and minds to listen, they would understand this profound truth.
WITHOUT THE DIVINE COMPASS OF HER FAITH, MY DAUGHTER MIGHT NOT BE WITH US TODAY.
For years, I have engaged with Texas lawmakers as an advocate for Ruby’s rights and for all transgender youth in our state. Our legislature convenes biennially, and during the last session, over 100 bills were introduced that threatened Ruby’s very being. The prospect of 2025 fills us with apprehension, especially with the looming presence of a more conservative presidential administration. In 2023, Governor Greg Abbott enacted a ban on gender-affirming care for minors, and the conservative agenda is poised to intensify. The Texas Republican Party’s current platform even advocates extending this ban to individuals up to the age of 26, threatening to criminalize parents and doctors who provide this life-saving care, falsely labeling it as “child abuse.”
In my meetings with lawmakers, I introduce myself as a Christian parent and implore them to pray with me. My aim is to demonstrate that those who weaponize our shared faith against my family do not represent the inclusive and affirming Christians across Texas. Countless people of faith in Texas stand in solidarity with the LGBTQ+ community, yet our voices are often marginalized when Republicans invoke “family values.” When these lawmakers cite the creation narrative of male and female as evidence against the existence of transgender individuals, they invalidate the faith of those who believe in a God who transcends binaries. My own faith teaches that God is a Trinity – Father, Son, and Holy Spirit – a concept that defies simplistic binary understanding. From the vast spectrum of skin tones to the myriad expressions of human identity, God’s creation is beautifully diverse and limitless.
Christianity, at its heart, is a message of love and liberation, not oppression and division. Yet, the divine message has been twisted by political agendas for far too long. Even the biblical prohibition against same-sex relationships in Leviticus is subject to misinterpretation. Scholarly research, such as highlighted in the documentary 1946: The Mistranslation that Shifted Culture, reveals that the term “homosexuality” was erroneously introduced into the Bible in 1946. Prior to this, the biblical text was understood to condemn exploitative relationships, not loving, consensual ones.
Furthermore, while conservative Christians rigidly adhere to gender roles as divinely ordained, Jesus himself never condemned or attempted to “heal” gender-nonconforming individuals like eunuchs.
The God I know is a God of love, and this love has been the cornerstone of our family’s journey. Before Ruby’s public coming out, she grappled with suicidal thoughts. The unwavering support and acceptance of our church community were instrumental in her healing and survival. Without the guiding light of her faith, my daughter might not be alive today. Her transgender identity is not a burden, but a profound aspect of who she is, a Trans Gift that enriches our lives and the lives of those around her.
Ruby and I recently shared our story in American Teenager, a powerful new book by LGBTQ+ journalist Nico Lang. This collection illuminates the lives of trans youth across the nation and the families who love and support them. Significantly, many of these stories, like ours, are rooted in faith. Clint, a Muslim high school student featured in the book, views his transgender identity through the lens of his faith, believing Allah to be far more expansive and complex than human notions of gender. He points out that the Quran deliberately avoids gendering the divine, with “Allah” translating to “the one,” a unification of masculine and feminine. The prophet Muhammad, in artistic representations, is often depicted not as a physical man but as an ethereal cloud, transcending earthly limitations. Living in Illinois, Clint thankfully does not face the same political persecution as Ruby, residing in a state that allows him to flourish as his authentic self.
Our decision to participate in American Teenager stemmed from years of battling the Texas Legislature. We felt compelled to amplify our voices and share our story as loudly as possible. Texas Republican leaders continue to introduce harmful legislation, including measures to deny transgender Texans like Ruby accurate driver’s licenses and birth certificates. Legal documents that misgender Ruby pose a grave threat to her safety, yet Texas continues to disregard her well-being. Shortly after Ruby’s renaming liturgy, she bravely testified against anti-trans legislation at the Texas Capitol. Her reception was chillingly dismissive. Instead of listening to her heartfelt testimony, Republican lawmakers checked their phones and avoided eye contact, their minds already closed to the reality of who she is and the validity of her trans gift.
It is deeply painful that those who harbor the most animosity are often fellow Christians. However, their ignorance only strengthens my resolve to fight for transgender children like Ruby. I will never cease to speak the truth: God’s love is infinitely greater than any human limitation. It is a transformative gift intended for all, and it must be shared with everyone.
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